Greetings hairless apes. Sparta Puss here. The bald monkeys have been rushing around like idiots for the past few days. They say they’re on holiday but then they go and do loads of D.I.Y. which is hard work, stressful and they are grumpy all the time. But what do I care? I don’t have to do it. I don’t have to do holidays either, because my entire life is a holiday.They are idiots.
So the she-ape says, “sit by the fire, Spartypants, and pose for me”. So I move over to the door and turn my back on her, because she’s an idiot. She says it’s work. I say, “Who’s she kidding, eh?” And what’s with the nickname? Spartypants, Spartykins, Spartypie, Puddypants YEEUURRGGHH! She’s an idiot.
This is her ‘work’ 😉 She rubs bits of paper in a book with no words with a dirty stick and calls it art. Idiot.
scribblah 
You tell it how it is, Start. Those bald apes are so stupid they think pictures of a grumpy cat are funny! Idiots!
I’ll tell you something else that’s stupid. Predictive text that turns Sparta into Start!
hahaha yes, I hate predictive text lol