Tag Archives: rats

The Cat And The Monkeys

10 Jan
sparta 1

Sparta Puss, about 1 minute of scribbling

Greetings hairless apes. Sparta Puss here, taking over the pooter box once again. It’s been a while but I’ve been busy, y’know, eating, sleeping, getting a little chunky to keep me warm through the winter, usual stuff. Something called Christmas happened and my bald monkeys gave me a tree to climb and it was full of baubles for me to throw around and I had lots of pretty paper to shred around the house and something called tinsel that I really enjoy swallowing because it makes the furless simians quite hysterical. And so many new boxes to sit in. They took the tree away a few days ago but they’re still finding baubles around the house. I hid them. Hah! And then I dumped a dead rat by the windowsill of the monkeys’ bedroom and the she-ape got even more hysterical than when I ate the tinsel. Bwahahahaha!!!!!

sparta 2

Sparta Puss, about 4 minutes of scribbling

The she-ape’s been making scribbles with dirt from a stick onto some paper and claiming that it looks like me again. She’s an idiot.

The Dog House

28 Apr

criminal

Greetings hairless apes. Sparta Puss here. It’s been a long time. My trained monkeys have been keeping me away from the pooter box but I managed to distract them for a while. It’s Spring and every year I bring them some rats to play with. Such fun. The she-ape jumps on chairs and squeals and the he-monkey does his soppy liberal thing of trying to shoo the stupid rodent out through a door before giving up and setting traps.

They’ve been curfewing me the past couple of years, locking the catflap throughout the night to try and stop me doing it, but I snuck this one in during the day and let it loose in the kitchen. It was there for days before they realised. HAHAHAHAHA!!!!! It’s great sport. I overheard them saying I’m in the dog house. Seems just like the normal house to me. Which is mine anyway. I’m going to the kitchen now to watch the monkey mayhem.

Ciao Miao 😀

The Stinky Rat

5 Jun

05 sparta

Greetings hairless apes. Sparta Puss here. It’s been a while; I’ve been busy sleeping, eating, hunting, sleeping….. The trained primates disappeared for a couple of days last week and left Ming and myself alone in the house overnight with an automatic food dispenser. Result!

Soon got bored with over-eating so I caught a rat and brought it back and chewed it a bit and let it go in the kitchen and it ran into a cupboard where I couldn’t get to it and it died. Then the monkeys came home. I didn’t let on. Just waited a few days until the vile stench started. Well, the apes went crazy trying to find out what the smell was and where it was coming from. Soooooo funny. It’s quite hot at the moment and the smell’s been getting stronger, really ripe.

Finally, this evening, the he-monkey searched all the cupboards and found the stinky rat. The she-ape screamed the place down. Soooooooo funny. They should make a bit more effort to keep the place clean, in my opinion.

The she-ape lit smelly candles all over the house and then banned me from playing with the pretty fire bit! Here are some scratchy lines the she-monkey did earlier. She says it’s me. She’s an idiot.

The Rat!

26 May

26 rats

This morning was so gorgeous, warm and sunny so I took the washing out to the garden to peg on the line and there was this dead rat! Sparta had been hunting again. Normally I forget that I’m a feminist and scream for Husb, but I gritted my teeth and fetched my sketchbook. I’m an artist, I should be prepared to draw whatever life puts my way. I felt sorry for the poor thing. It was only a young rat and looked as if it was sunbathing in the grass, apart from the flies that were bothering it. Then little Ming scampered over and started playing with it. EEEEWWWW!!! Then I started yelling for Husb.

The Hunter

7 Feb

27 sparta

Another dead rat in the hallway this evening and one very proud psycho-kitteh strutting around, well pleased with herself. We’ve had a spate of dead rats in recent weeks, some of them quite large and we found out last week where they’re coming from – our compost bin. Husb noticed that our kitchen waste was breaking down very quickly – too quickly! He poked around and found a network of tunnels through the compost. Rats have been burrowing in and scoffing our kitchen scraps…..and Sparta has been lying in wait and killing the rats. Well, that’s what our species domesticated the little furry ones for; protecting our homes and food from rodents.

14 my chair

Although I sometimes think that WE’RE the ones who’ve been domesticated! Husb has secured the bottom of the bin and there doesn’t seem to be any more rat action inside the compost, but this evening’s corpse shows that they’re still coming round to take a look. I’m amazed that she can drag a rat through two cat flaps, across a large kitchen and down a long corridor in her tiny little jaws. She’s a very small cat. The top image is a photopolymer plate etching of Sparta and the lower one, a drawing from one of my sketchbooks.

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